Just as Benjamin Franklin convinced us that nothing in the world was certain but death and taxes, nothing in the office is as certain as boredom and consequently, gossip. Gossip is an inevitable and unavoidable pettiness in the workplace. No matter your stance on it, it will always prevail and it will always be there. Just as we manage daily our grasp on death and taxes, we must manage and deal with office gossip. Here are some tips on coping: 1. NEVER be the person spreading the gossip. Unless you want the nickname Chatty Cathy, and then by all means, go for it. 2. When it eventually comes your way, remember that office gossip is similar to the game telephone you played as a kid. It certainly isn’t the same information it was when it started.3. When the information comes your way, play ambivalent. I don’t care if you just found out that your boss is sleeping with the CEO of your company and it finally explains how the idiot has kept … [Read more...] about Office Gossip: As Certain As Death and Taxes
Career Advice
What Is Vocation?
Some people squirm at the mention of the word "vocation." (Not to be confused with vacation - how could anyone be uncomfortable with a vacation?) Some people equate it with the word "calling," which usually implies some sort of religious component. Some people picture chains when they think of the word. They avoid thinking about "vocation" because it means being locked into something for the rest of their lives. I think vocation is something different than that. I prefer this definition: Activity pursued as a livelihood. It says nothing about work. It doesn't mention a job. It is broader, more encompassing. Even the word livelihood can have a broader definition than the more narrow view that it is a means for support or sustenance. To really live, to have a thriving "livelihood," humans need much more than money. We need purpose, we need human interaction, we need support. If we take vocation at its broader meaning, it can start to provide for … [Read more...] about What Is Vocation?
Maintaining Happiness & Motivation at Work
If you haven’t already taken my advice and left your job, you should do so now. If you’re still not walking out the door, then all I can do is offer some friendly advice. Below are some ideas I used to follow when I worked at my last testosterone fueled job. This job was proper “boiler room” stuff, and these suggestions used to help me stay motivated and happy, so hopefully, they can help you too. Do it NOW, not later When you have one of those annoying chores to do, do not sit there and think about it. Just do it (as the marketing-gimps in Nike like to say). The more you think about doing a task, the less likely you are to do it. Each negative thought you associate with the task will increase the perceived difficulty level, making you feel less empowered to do it. This will also make you more stressed, so when you are eventually forced to do “that report” or “those figures,” you probably will not do a good job. So, quite simply, go do it now…avoiding all that unneeded stress … [Read more...] about Maintaining Happiness & Motivation at Work
Search for a Job Like You're House Hunting
Long-time readers of this blog (and podcast listeners!) might be aware that I'm on the prowl for a new house. Always the obsessor, I'm in full research mode. Maps, charts, grids, financial tables and so on. Given that this is the single largest investment I might ever make, it certainly warrants extensive research. And that got me thinking... We should all put this amount of effort into the job hunt. But I'm willing to bet that many of us don't. Here are a few reasons why you should make your job hunt like a house hunt. Is It the Right Price (Salary): When looking for a home, it is important to first understand what you can afford. The same way it's key to know what salary range you are comfortable with. It's easy to fall into the trap of looking for a job that offers less (or more) pay than your qualifications and experience dictate. Whether it's a house or a job, narrowing down your search will yield better results, over a … [Read more...] about Search for a Job Like You're House Hunting
Texting In Sick: The How-To Guide
With the emergence of text messaging and e-mails, normal human interaction is on the decline. Texting in particular, has replaced regular telephone conversation, and we no longer have to worry about ad-lib mistakes in dialogue. In fact, we can edit and re-edit everything we wish to convey, so we appear cleverer, funnier, and more literate than we may actually be. So why not use this exuberant gift from the Gods for a higher purpose? Why not use it to text in sick to work? (Editor's note: Proceed with caution. If you need a reminder of the dangers of texting in sick, click here.) Below is a tried and tested way to text in sick to work. I know it works, because I use it. I use it all the time. In fact, I’m using it right now which is why I’m sitting on my firm ass writing this beautiful piece of slightly arousing art. Oh my God, did I just say that? It’s a pity my delete button is broken, otherwise, I’d use it. Anyway, here’s how it works. The Day Before When you are in work … [Read more...] about Texting In Sick: The How-To Guide
Fighting a Creative Black Hole at Work
The corporate office park can be a black hole when it comes to creativity. Let's face it: People without progressive ideas are more passive, thus easier to manage. Many companies, unfortunately, have systems in place to stifle creativity. If you are unfortunate enough to land at a place that shoots down your forward-thinking ideas on contact, fear not. There are still several ways you can get that creative fix - and still collect a paycheck.Blog.Many are scared that they'll get fired for blogging on company time. But as long as you're not outing company secrets - and the topic is unrelated to your business - I argue that it can actually help you hone your writing skills and creative thinking, in turn, benefiting you and your employer.Log Thoughts. Keep a calendar of what you would like to do. Yesterday's fleeting idea could be the groundwork for tomorrow's business plan. It all comes down to taking action - but it starts with a seed. … [Read more...] about Fighting a Creative Black Hole at Work
5 Reasons to Quit Your Job Today
Hmm, now some might say I’m biased towards working because I’m a lazy piece of sh*t. Others might say I’m doing the right thing, when I give two fingers to the system, and quit a job I’m unhappy with. But you, what do you think deep down? Do you love your job so much that you want to spend nearly half your life there? If you do, then great, go nuts! But if you’re like me (and I have an inkling you are), then we should do something. We should do something amazing. We should all just leave our jobs, and let nature take its course. Here are 5 reasons why we should quit our jobs: 1. Unhappiness. Nobody actually really likes working. However, if you're one of those people who insists you really love your job, I don’t believe you. Actually I would go as far as saying that you people should be burned at the stake. Now this may seem a bit harsh, but in order to make a delicious Shangri-La omelet it is necessary to burn, I mean break a few eggs. … [Read more...] about 5 Reasons to Quit Your Job Today
The Truth About Teachers
More Sex and the City than Head of the Class, many of today's teachers are just like you and me: potty-mouthed servants living paycheck to paycheck, suffering from the Sunday Night Blues.As a kid, teachers were in a league of their own. They existed only to teach. I never pictured them heading home, cooking dinner, paying bills, and so on. While none of these are major revelations, it's a good time to remind you about the truth surrounding one... >They curse. No big surprise here. But did you know that many of them curse about the children. F'n bastards,' 'little prick,' as*hole,' etc.No word is too vulgar to describe the misgivings of students. You might think your child is not applicable. Think again.>They have sex. Some even with each other. Of course there's the occasional headline-grabbing sexually depraved animal that takes advantage of children. No. I'm talking about full-on consensual, legal, legitimate … [Read more...] about The Truth About Teachers
Proof That You Are Never Stuck at Work
Being stuck at work, feeling trapped or powerless, is nothing more than a mind f*ck. You have a lot more control than you think. Don't believe me? I'll prove it to you. Enter Exhibit A: The Energy Wheel. Life expectancy varies from country to country and is based on many factors. However, assuming you are reading this from North America or Europe, there's a good chance you will live for more than 25,000 days. Each day brings a new feeling. A new chance to make it what you want. At this very moment, you might feel stuck at work or in a 'dead-end job' or career, but you are not. Take a look at the image below. Life is continuous change. At any given moment you could be anywhere within the Energy Wheel. Cause while it might look like only a few options, it actually represents the full range of feelings you can experience when at work. HOT NEGATIVE = Conflict HOT POSITIVE = Inspiration COOL NEGATIVE = Stagnation COOL POSITIVE = Accomplishment In the past, I've … [Read more...] about Proof That You Are Never Stuck at Work
How to Develop an Executive Persona
This is a guest blog by Chris O’ HaraEver noticed that everyone in executive management positions speak in the exact same annoying, almost clone like, subdued, yet slightly rude, Ben Affleck voice. They even have the same mannerisms in the way they act and dress. It’s like there is a secret training club where directors go and learn these skills. Actually there is a club, and I’ve been there, but tell no-one, or I may be at risk of losing my spleen. Here are 4 ways to develop an executive persona: 1. The look:Imitate the way these people dress; they look smart and clean - like they should be taken seriously. Buy a good quality suit, one that looks expensive but doesn’t stand out too much. You can find these in clothing outlets for a decent price if you look closely enough. The key is in the way it fits. Not too baggy, not too tight. Also, cut your hair and make sure you are clean shaven. Think American Psycho. You may even want to buy a pair of … [Read more...] about How to Develop an Executive Persona