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The title of this blog post comes from the 1960s self-help book written by Transactional Analysis (TA) pioneer Eric Berne. For many of us, office small talk is the bane of our existence. Not only is empty conversation annoying, it contributes to the hamster-on-the-wheel monotony our offices seem so good at delivering. Whether you love, hate, or are indifferent to these conversations, I'm curious to know what YOU say after "hello." Many hallway conversations go like this: Person A: "Hey, how's it going?" Person B: "I'm good. And you?" Person A: "Good, thanks." If we have that exchange every day for a year, and then on day no. 366 we extend the conversation with an additional "stroke," we're likely to raise the suspicion of the person we're talking to. Of course, if the conversation is regularly extended, people can move relationships beyond those of mere coworkers, and friendships can develop. Read more of my post at US News & World Report. … [Read more...] about What Do You Say After You Say Hello?

You stumble out of bed, bleary eyed and only one resonating thought: coffee. You space out on the way to work, seemingly forgetting the drive in your haze. Enter the tortuous place (commonly known as work) that is responsible for this fog. If you are like the overwhelming majority of the population, you fit into this category rather than the chipper, happy to be alive, seize the day, almost alien-like other category: morning people. What is with these people? Where does their energy come from? Where does their will to live reside and how are they so happy at 8:00am? The truth is that I’m envious. I want to know their secret, so I decided to get some answers. Is it my fault that I hate the world early in the morning? Or are there factors outside of my control when I unleash on innocent and unsuspecting bystanders with my anger in the morning? What I found out is that it is a mixture of both. The morning person vs. night owl fits in quite well to the nature vs. nurture … [Read more...] about Not a Morning Person? Here is who to blame.

Almost everywhere we turn, trust is on the decline. Trust in our culture at large, in our institutions, and in our companies is significantly lower than a generation ago. Research shows that only 49% of employees trust senior management, and only 28% believe CEOs are a credible source of information. Consider the loss of trust and confidence in the financial markets today. Indeed, "trust makes the world go ‘round," and right now we're experiencing a crisis of trust. This crisis compels us to ask three questions. First, is there a measurable cost to low trust? Second, is there a tangible benefit to high trust? Third, how can the best leaders build trust in and within their organizations to reap the benefits of high trust?Most people don't know how to think about the organizational and societal consequences of low trust because they don't know how to quantify or measure the costs of such a so-called "soft" factor as trust. For many, trust is intangible, ethereal, unquantifiable. If … [Read more...] about How the Best Leaders Build Trust