Job Song Lyrics to Job Song :[Consequence:]Excuse me I beg your pardon?Nah, wha-wait hold up hold up hold up hold upBitch you don'tI don't get paid enough for you to be talkin to me like thatStraight up and downI don't feel like standin the by fuckin front door aight?You know what? Matter fact, a year from nowWhen you at home on your only day off and you watchin UPNYou see me come up there and get my motherfuckin awardTell yo' kids I saidHow to get stuck in a dead-end job when I can rapWhen I call my bill collectors they ain't tryin to hear thatMatter fact they askin Dexter when I plan the paybackOn that long line of credit that they lent me way backWay back, way back, at the turn of the centuryThe notice they sent to me is sayin essentiallyIf I don't pay that balance off along with a extra feePenitentiary or criminal chargesProbably soon to follow if you dare disregard thisAnd that got me nauseous, and feelin precautiousCause the fruits of my labor, ain't barin no harvestAt least as … [Read more...] about Work Lyrics: this just ain't where I'm 'sposed to be
Internship Candidates…Listen Up!
Don’t Forget to Put Your Name on the ResumeI recently visited a friend in Chicago who is at the point in growing her one-woman business that she needs help. Her biz is in a creative field and she’s fortunate to be in a city with multiple art/creative schools. Hiring an intern from one of these places seemed like an ideal solution; she gets a creative, enthusiastic “employee” and the student gets to learn the biz. Win, win, right? Well…until she placed the ad.The ad stated very clear parameters - the experience preferred, general duties, hours/days, send a resume, etc. In a very short time, she had sixty responses. While she was able to cull some very favorable prospects from the group, there were some surprising clunkers. One person even forgot to put their name on the resume. Duh-oh.Now many of these folks are students at some of the most prestigious, well-respected art schools in the country and I’m sure the raw talent is mind-blowing. But do … [Read more...] about Internship Candidates…Listen Up!
3 Candidates Submit the Same Cover Letter!
I'm on the prowl for a part-time editorial assistant in the New York area at a major non-profit organization. The job was posted two weeks ago and has yielded over 450 resumes. What started out as an exciting task of expanding my skeleton staff has turned into a harsh reminder of how bleak things are out there in the (un)employment world - especially for people with a writing/communications/journalism background.Dozens of applicants have Ivy League educations. Hundreds have advanced degrees. And almost every single person is over-qualified for the $16-an-hour gig. The biggest challenge, from a hiring perspective, is finding someone who will stick around for at least six months. Wading through a sea of applicants is tough work. But three candidates made my life easy. They gave me the opportunity to reject them instantly. Why?They each used the EXACT SAME COVER LETTER!B-U-S-T-E-DWhat tipped me off was that each started with a relatively … [Read more...] about 3 Candidates Submit the Same Cover Letter!
Working Podcast #93: Too Many Cooks In the Kitchen
Join the Jobacle campaign to help restore linear communication at work! Who is hiring for the holiday season in 2009? Find out how much umpires make a year and hear a solution to Major League Baseball's major problem. Job Song. Direct Download … [Read more...] about Working Podcast #93: Too Many Cooks In the Kitchen
Office Romance? Why Not Try a Different Dating Pool?
David Letterman’s recent escapades and his subsequent blackmailer’s attempt have put a spotlight on the office romance. By no means am I passing judgment on the work hook-up, but it just seems to me an overall really bad idea that most likely doesn’t end well.(As a therapist and wellness advocate, there are some “absolutely not” connections. Those involve abuse of power in a boss/subordinate relationship, sexual harassment and any behavior that makes co-workers feel very uncomfortable or even unsafe in the work environment. I won’t go into those here because most of you hopefully agree those are beyond uncool.)Can’t you hear all those HR personnel scurrying around to get an official “Office Fraternization Policy & Guidelines” in place? While working in Corporate World, I don’t remember anyone formally addressing the issue. I do, however, remember what it was like when co-workers were more than pals. In one company I worked … [Read more...] about Office Romance? Why Not Try a Different Dating Pool?
Today Is Slap Your Co-Worker Day!
October 23rd is the official Slap Your Irritating Co- workers Holiday: Do you have a co- worker who talks nonstop about nothing, working your last nerve with tedious and boring details that you don't care about? Do you have a co-worker who ALWAYS screws up stuff creating MORE work for you? Do you have a co-worker who kisses so much booty; you can look in their mouth and see what your boss had for lunch? Do you have a co-worker who is SOOO obnoxious, when he/she enters a room, everyone else clears it? Well, on behalf of Ike Turner, I am so very very glad to officially announce SLAP YOUR IRRITATING CO-WORKER DAY! Here are the rules you must follow: * You can only slap one person per hour - no more. * You can slap the same person again if they irritate you again in the same day. * You are allowed to hold someone down as other co- workers take their turns slapping the irritant. * No weapons are allowed...other than going upside somebody's head with a … [Read more...] about Today Is Slap Your Co-Worker Day!
Haiku Contest Winners
With so many great entries, I decided to pull the winners of our Jobacle Haikus About Work contest at random. Thanks to the hundreds who entered and thousands who read! $100 Visa Gift CardWINNER: Katie Smith - Superhero Action Figure: Your choice of one real-life superhero action firgure: BossMan, SuperMom, MoneyMan, or GeekMan. (provided by HappyWorker.com)WINNER: Tanja Cilia- Cube Guard "Door" for Your Cubicle: Add a "door" to your cube in seconds and they'll never invade your personal space again. (provided by CubeGuard.com)WINNER: Cinnamon StuckeyA bunch of other people will be contacted for their addresses as we give away tons of great career books. Stay tuned for a new contest coming next week... … [Read more...] about Haiku Contest Winners
How to Be a Hero at Work
I'm finally getting around to tying up some loose ends, one of them being my long overdue take on the book "Be the Hero: Three Powerful Ways to Overcome Challenges in Work and Life" by Noah Blumenthal.I've often used the Jobacle soapbox to preach that you have the power to improve your work situation, despite the seemingly uncontrollable obstacles in your way. Every day at work you have a choice to make it a 'good' day or a 'bad' day. The same goes for being a victim or hero. Which would you rather be? The hero of course! (sans the tight spandex and silly cape).Written as a parable (succinct prose that illustrates a moral lesson, for those of you who forgot English 101), the breezy book tells the tale of EveryWorker Jeff, an office dweller who learns how to transition himself from zero to hero, gaining new perspective thanks to 'Hero Coach' Martin.What I like best about the book is that it outlines actionable ideas that anyone can implement instantly, resulting … [Read more...] about How to Be a Hero at Work
“Co”-working With Your Co-habitant
Work with me, Babee!In an earlier post, Conference Call Do’s and Don’ts, I mentioned my spouse works from home one day a week. This is different from my work, which I do at home every day. Working at home has unique challenges and contrary to popular belief, isn’t all about wearing your jammies and quitting every day by 4 p.m. to watch Oprah. So what happens when you mix two different personality and work styles in a small home office?In our case, it wasn’t pretty at first. I heard things like, “you can’t type while I’m on a call.” “Uh, well I have to type - I’m a WRITER,” was my dumbfounded response. Having a touch of adult ADD (hey, don’t we all?), my spouse was very easily distracted, so most anything I did would break his concentration. I admit his presence in what I considered to be my office kind of cramped my style, too. Hey, sometimes a girl has to take a break to shop on Nordstrom.com.I’m happy to … [Read more...] about “Co”-working With Your Co-habitant
Playing a Game of Telephone at Work
The invention of the middle manager created a buffer that effectively keeps a company's 'elite' segregated from the 'clerical riff raff.' It also falsely empowers those who strive for success by placating them with a promotion. It's the illusion of more control. And I am that middle manager.I'm not sure about your world at work, but in my experience, simple job tasks have become games of connect the dots. There are 17 people involved when there should be two. This leads to too many opinions, a lot of static noise and a hyper-connectivity, which in this blogger's humble opinion, leads to work of a lesser quality.Many middle management positions are redundant and should be eliminated. (Not mine of course! I am uber important).With the way we communicate becoming easier, more instantaneous and cheaper than ever before, the middle man can truly be cut from the equation. But our jobs are safe for now, because the fat cat, golf playing upper crust folks … [Read more...] about Playing a Game of Telephone at Work