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How to Choose an “Emotional” Pitstop – Part 1

by Werdna Yug Leave a Comment

How to Choose an “Emotional” Pitstop – Part 1

Finding Help for Major Career Issues

I can only recall one job that had no inherent stress: I worked in a small card shop while in grad school. I read funny cards, rang up a few sales and had plenty of time to study. The majority of people experience some level of stress or difficult issue at work and it helps to have a supportive, sympathetic ear when you need to talk it through. But sometimes it’s hard to know who would be the best fit when discussing major career issues. Do you talk to your co-workers, boss, a psychotherapist, friends, family or parents, etc.? When does it make more sense to consult a career coach?

First, let’s look at the pros and cons of getting emotional support from the people in your personal life. (Co-workers fall in both personal and professional areas as they can also be good friends.)

Friends

Pros:

    * They know you well and are mostly tuned into what you need.
    * They also have some history with you and your work life.
    * They are readily accessible.

Cons:

    * Your friends may not be familiar with your industry or even know much about your job.
    * They may not be able to always be objective – they’re in your corner!
    * You may have worn them out with tales of woe at work.

 
Co-worker/Friends

Pros:

    * They know your work environment, prevalent issues and politics.
    * They are trusted confidants.
    * Even if it’s sinking, you’re in the same boat.

Cons:

    * Because they work with you, they may not be able to see a different perspective.
    * Although a trusted colleague in the past, loyalties can shift in a hostile work environment and it becomes “every man for him self.”

 
Family/Parents

Pros:

    * These people also have your back.
    * They could offer financial support if you lose the job.

Cons:

    * If the relationship is dysfunctional, they may not be able to offer you healthy support.
    * They may not completely understand your struggle, industry, etc.

 
While your personal relationships might offer support, a sounding board and reassurance, it might be best to weigh how much information and degree of detail you share. You may get some immediate relief from the job stress, but this support system may not be able to help you strategize solutions.

And remember – friends and family are wonderful resources, but you don’t want to deplete them.

In Part II – When is your boss a good choice or is assistance from a therapist or career coach warranted?

This is a post by Nancy LaFever. You can read more from her at the Centre for Emotional Wellbeing blog.

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